Just forget the words and sing along

Sunday, December 18, 2005

Dude! I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier!

Ever since I started watching Saturday Night Live, something about the late hour wreaks havoc with my memory, and I find that, on Sunday morning, I'm struggling to remember what I watched the night before.

So, what I'm going to do is keep running notes on SNL, and post it here on my blog! How about that?

So, let's start with the Saturday, December 17 episode. Guest host: Jack Black.

A Holiday Message from Dick Cheney - Little kids asking "Santa Cheney" for an extension to the Patriot Act, drilling in Alaska, and all other kinds of Republican chicanery. Ends with George W. asking for an Xbox 360.

Opening credits.

Jack Black's opening monologue. He sings his rejected King Kong theme song.

The fake commercial: the Stuart Little Mouse Removal Kit. A little convertable-shaped mouse trap.

First segment - OK, so this family is Christmas shopping, they're in a crowded restaurant, but the only available table is next to the door, and every time the door opens, they're blown over by the wind. Lame-ass slapstick dominates.

Appalachian Emergency Room - The ER of a hillbilly hospital. Always good. Gratuitious cameo by Johnny Knoxville.

YES! A Robert Smigel cartoon! - Christmastime for the Jews. The Jews all party on Christmas because there's no Christians hogging everything. It's a doo-whop song, with stop-motion animation a la Rankin/Bass.

Channel 5 News Team Photo - The Channel 5 News TEam is taking their new promotional photo, in which they all point at each other, and Jack Black gets all pissy that no one's pointing at him. Not too bad. "I'm just trying to get some finger lovin' up in here."

Oh. An SNL Digital Short Film - "Lazy Sunday" Gangerster rap about two guys sleeping in on Sunday morning, then going to see Chronicles of Narnia. Hilarious.

Musical guest #1: Neil Young - Or, as I like to call it, "Time to raid the fridge."

Weekend Update with Tina Fey and Amy Pohler - I LOVE YOU, TINA FEY!! Oh, er, um, I typed that. "Just a reminder, there are 7 shopping days left until 'Holiday.'" And a gratuitious cameo by Tracey Morgan.

Debbie Downer - Debbie ruins Christmas for Santa.
Santa>> How'd you like an Easy Bake oven for Christmas?
Debbie>> Better not. My Barbie might try to stick her head in it.

Brokeback Planet - A human and an alien are standed on a deserted moon together. The alien reveals he has both male and female genetalia and proceeds to throw itself at the human. Not as funny as you'd think.

2 A-Holes Buying a Christmas Tree - the name says it all. Quite clever, actually.

State Spelling Bee Finals - A student blanks on the word "business," then just rambles off an unending list of letters. Funnier than it sounds. Then Jack Black shows up with his ol' Tenacious D partner and it turns into a musical number.

Oh, Neil Young's back. Time to get a drink.

And, end credits roll. Next time they're live is January 14, with guest host Scarlett Johannsen.

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