"People of NAIT! I humbly ask for your help. I used to work in Japan, and I was in such a rush to come home that I forgot one of my most treasure possessions at my former place of work: A Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla movie poster. I asked my former place of work to mail it to me. They said no, citing that mailing a poster from Japan to Canada costs too much. So I sent them the money to send the poster. That was six months ago. Still no poster. In fact, nothing from my former place of work! Not a peep, not a word, not even a 'thanks for all the letters, e-mails, and faxes you've sent us about your movie poster!
Finally pissed off with this, I got in touch with my former head office. My former head office looked into the matter and said, "Well, Mark, turns out you left the country without paying your final phone bill and power bill. Your former workplace is holding on to your movie poster until you send them the money to pay your bills." My first reaction was sheer annoyance that my former place of work didn't tell me this six months ago. Once I vented my anger by going outside and screaming at the heavens, I wrote a nice diplomatic response that went like this: "Well, gee, thanks for NOT telling me. Thanks for letting me stew in silence for the past six months! So, how much do I freakin' owe?" Of course, I said it more politely.
But the wheels in my head began turning. Being an enterprising young RTA student, I started thinking, "How can I turn this into a promotion for my radio show, Chaos in a Box, Thursday mornings at 9 on NR92?" So here's what I've come up with.
I don't have an exact total for how much money I owe yet, but my best estimates come to about $60. Do you know what that means? All I need is 60 of you to send $1 to Japan! Everyone who sends $1 to Japan will be entered into a collossal draw for a grand prize to be determined later. Since I'm asking you to pony up $60 of your money, it's only fair that I pony up $60 of my money for the prize. Once I get my Godzilla poster back, all entrants will be invited to the grand unveiling party where the grand prize will be drawn! Nifty, eh?
So, all you have to do is send $1 to my former place of employment. That address is
Next Issue...More Powerful than a Bowl of Jell-o
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