Today, I turn 30. When the hell did this happen?
Ever since my mid-teens, I've kind of been waiting for that birthday where I wake up to find I've magically become a responsible adult. What can I say? The "adult fairy" hasn't visited me yet. I've often joked that very little has changed since I was 9. I've still got a sprawling collection of Star Wars action figures, I'm counting down the hours to when I see that Transformers movie, and I still lie awake at night wondering what it's like to kiss a girl.
Although, at my age, I should probably start focusing on kissing women.
I've also been joking that "30 is the new 40," mainly because all my friends who've beaten me to 30 seem to be going through varying degrees of mid-life crises. It's like when they get past 25, they go, "Holy crap! Back in college I said I was going to change the world, and I haven't done it yet! I'd better get on that." Hey, I'm just as guilty. At 26, I decided to finally fulfill that dream of being a radio announcer. Two years of school, a year of looking for the first job in the industry, and despite working my tail off, just not quite there yet. Just something about seeing that odometer hit a zero makes you go "Whoa."
I still remember the first time I actually felt old. I was in NAIT, partways through the second semester. Me and a classmate were doing remotes from the South Lobby. when some Paula Abdul standard came on the air, I started singing along and dancing a bit, and my classmate looked at me like I was from Io.
I tried to explain my behaviour to her. "this song was a big hit in the summer of 1989! That had to be the greatest summer of my childhood! I was 12 years old, the Ninja Turtles were at their peak, and you couldn't spit without hitting Batman merchandise! C'mon, don't you remember the summer of 1989?"
She looked at me with a puzzled expression that bordered on annoyance. Finally she said, "In the summer of 1989, I was three years old."
Or as one co-worker said to me the other day, "You know all the babies born in that magical summer of yours? Well, guess what? They turn legal this year."
I can quite honestly say this is not where I expected to be when I hit 30. You know, I thought I'd own a house, own a car, and I definitely didn't think I'd still be a virgin. And yet, here I am. At times like this, the list of things you haven't accomplished seems to be longer than the things you have accomplished.
I've got to try to focus on the things I have accomplished. I have a degree in physics and math, something that people tell me is hard to get. I've been an insanely popular radio announcer. Yes, it was college radio, and I think it does count. I've worked behind the scenes on a reality TV show. I've even danced in my underwear in a music video, and everyday I thank God it hasn't popped up on YouTube.
Every day, I ask myself two questions: "Where am I going? What am I doing?"
Some day, I'll actually have answers.
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