Pirates and Martians

From the title of this entry, you might be thinking that I've got some idea for a Cowboys and Aliens knock-off, but no, I don't.  There's just two new movie trailers out that I want to talk about.

First up, The Pirates! Band of Misfits.  Finally!  It was about time that Aardman gave us another stop-motion animated epic!

Our story thus far:  Aardman Animation.  Legendary British animation studio.  They began gaining worldwide attention in the 1990s thanks to their superstar animator Nick Park and his creations Wallace and Gromit.  Apparently, back when Jeffery Katzenburg was still at Disney, he wanted Disney to enter into a distribution deal with Aardman, much like the original deal Disney had with Pixar.  Michael Eisner apparently didn't like that idea, though, so when Katzenburg left to become one of the founders of Dreamworks, entering into a deal with Aardman was one of his first goals.

The Dreamworks/Aardman deal produced 2000's Chicken Run (which I still think is one of the funniest animated films ever made), 2005's Wallace and Gromit in the Curse of the Were-Rabbit, and 2006's Flushed Away, which was Aardman's first foray into computer animation.  After Flushed Away, Dreamworks decided to end their partnership with Aardman.  Aardman quickly found a new partner with Sony Studios, and they've been hard at work ever since.

The first film in the Aardman/Sony deal is the computer-animated Christmas film Arthur Christmas, coming out this December.  But the second one is the one I'm excited about, as it's Aardman's return to the stop-motion animation that made them famous, The Pirates! Band of Misfits.

Based on the Pirates! series of books by Gideon Dafoe, The Pirates! Band of Misfits is about a band of pirates voyaging across the seas to reach the Pirate of the Year competition.  Along the way, they do battle with fellow pirates, evade the forces of Queen Victoria, and even a young scientist by the name of Charles Darwin gets involved with their crew.

For the celebrity voice cast, Hugh Grant, in his first voice artist role, voices our hero, known only as the Pirate Captain.  Jeremy Piven and Selma Hayek voice two rival pirates, Black Bellamy and Cutlass Liz, and the 10th Doctor himself, David Tennant, voices Darwin.

It's co-directed by Peter Lord (co-director of Chicken Run and director of countless Aardman shorts) and Jeff Newitt, a veteran Aardman animator.  It hits theatres March 30, 2012.

---

Now, the next trailer that's caught my eye, John Carter.  This is one that they've been trying to bring to theatres for a long, long time.

It's based on the epic series of books John Carter of Mars, written by Edgar Rice Burroughs.  You probably recognize him as the creator of Tarzan.  It's a series of science fiction novels that Burroughs wrote between the 1910s and the 1940s, and it's considered one of the most influential science fiction series of all time.  Hollywood's been trying to adapt it for years, but the sheer number of fantastic locations and alien life forms have long rendered the series unfilmable.  But, in this post-Star Wars prequel/Lord of the Rings/Avatar world, the unfilmable is quickly becoming filmable. 

The adventure series follows the adventures of John Carter, a soldier in the American Civil War who passes out in a cave one day, and wakes up magically transported to the planet Mars...or Barsoom, as the natives call it.  He finds a world at war, consisting of Red Martians, Green Martians, and the Tharks, which are 14 feet tall, have tusks and four arms. He also finds that, thanks to Barsoom's lighter gravity, he is granted super strength and the ability to leap long distances.

As I said, over the past 10 years, a lot of the unfilmable has become filmable, and the John Carter property has been passed around Hollywood quite a bit over the past decade.  In one unusual circumstance, Robert Rodriguiz was set to direct, with Internet movie news mogul Harry Knowles to produce. 

But the property finally made its way to Disney, and Disney decided to tackle it with gusto.  And again, I am very curious about this film because of who Disney chose to direct:  Andrew Stanton, the veteran Pixar animator who directed A Bug's Life, Finding Nemo, and Wall-E.  This will be Stanton's live-action directorial debut.  Indeed, because of Stanton's involvement, there was a rumor going around that John Carter would be the first live-action film to carry the Pixar label. 

The movie John Carter is largely based on the first novel in the series, entitled A Princess of Mars.  Taylor Kitsch, whom you may remember as Gambit in X-Men Origins: Wolverine, is playing John Carter.  Lynn Collins plays Dejah Thoris, a Red Martian and the princess of Mars in the title.  And Willem Dafoe plays Tars Tarkas, a Thark warrior who will be brought to life using the same performance capture technology that brought the Na'vi to life in Avatar.

John Carter hits theatres on March 9, 2012. 

Latest Targ's Up!

Wow, been a while, hasn't it?  The day job got busy, and U62: The Targ got put on the backburner.

Long time listeners know I usually take the summer off, but I figured I should at least come back and do a proper season finale.  So that's Episode 4.24: Cute Little Caboose.  I offer up my thoughts on Google Plus, Transformers 3, and the trekkies' long quest to find love.



Give it a listen!

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The Athabasca Fly-In BBQ

Makin' movies again!

Today, the Athabasca Regional Airport had their first ever "Fly-In/Drive-In BBQ."  Basically, pilots from all across the province were invited to fly into Athabasca, hang out, show off their planes, and just see what the town has to offer.  As I've been describing it to listeners, it's like a show and shine, but with airplanes instead of cars.



They've hoping to make this an annual event, to help promote the Athabasca Airport and get the word out to all these hobbyist pilots who are looking for a fun day trip.

Anyway, took my camera out there, took a few pictures, and made a bit of a movie.  Enjoy!

Batman: Year One DVD Details

As I've blogged before, I'm enjoying the DC Comics/Warner Brothers direct-to-DVD animated films, but I'm starting to grow frustrated with them.  Apparently, Warner Brothers has decreed that they will only make movies about Batman and Superman, as those are the two characters whose DVDs have sold the most.  That sucks, because this would be a fantastic showcase for some of the better-known B-list, bordering on A-list heroes, like The Flash and Captain Marvel.  But no, we just keep getting more and more Batman and Superman.

Hence their next one, Batman: Year One, coming out on October 18.  It's based on Frank Miller's legendary re-telling of Batman's origin.  Again, this choice deeply frustrates me, mainly because a lot of the good elements of Batman: Year One wound up in Batman Begins, so the whole thing is going to be deja vu all over again.









For the celebrity voices, former star of The O.C. Ben McKenzie does the voice of young Batman/Bruce Wayne; Bryan Cranston, who played the witless dad on Malcolm in the Middle and is currently winning awards for his portrayal of a desperate high school chem teacher/meth manufacturer in Breaking Bad, does the voice of young Commisoner Gordon; Eliza Dushku, still best remembered as Faith on Buffy, will be voicing young Catwoman; Katee Sackhoff of Battlestar: Galactica voices Det. Sarah Essen; and veteran character actor Alex Rocco voices crime lord Carmine "The Roman" Falcone.

They announced the bonus features for this one, and as they always do, it's loaded to bear.  On the DVD, you'll find the bonus features:

• The featurette Heart of Vengeance: Returning Batman to His Roots, which analyzes the original comic mini-series and Frank Miller's take on Batman.
• The featurette Conversations with DC Comics, in which many of the current writers and artists on the Batman comics talk about Year One and Frank Miller's influence. 
• Running commentary with producer Alan Burnett, co-director Sam Liu, voice director Andrea Romano, and Mike Carlin, whose role on the crew I'm not sure of.  
• Batman: Year One; Issue 1 in digital comic form
• A preview of the next direct-to-video animated film, Justice League:  Doom, which is apparently based on the Tower of Babel storyline.  
• Two bonus episodes of Batman: The Animated Series

However, the crown jewel of bonus features is that they've decided to resurrect their DC Showcase series of animated short films, in which a well-known DC Comics B-list hero gets their own solo short film.  The DC Showcase film on this one?  Catwoman.  Eliza Dushku will be voicing Catwoman in this short as well, and it was written by legendary Batman: The Animated Series writer Paul Dini.

So, yeah.  Like a sucker, I'll buy this.  For Catwoman.

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows Trailer

When Sherlock Holmes first came out in 2009, I was somewhat surprised to learn that a lot of my friends were Holmes geeks.  I started feeling out of the loop as I could get involved with the debates as to whether it was faithful to the source material or not.  For all practical purposes, it was my first exposure to the Holmes universe, and I liked what I saw.  I felt the movie to be good, but not great.  The one thing that really blew me away about the film was Hans Zimer's Oscar-nominated score.






I walked into the theatre respecting the film's pedigree.  I mean, Guy Ritchie, director of Snatch and Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels was directing, and I liked those films.  Robert Downey Jr is riding new waves of awesome, and Jude Law was pretty good, too.  But still, the film as a whole just never really knocked my socks off.

But still, it made a whole bunch of money, so that means the filmmakers get to try to blow me away again with a sequel, Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows, hitting theatres this December.

Guy Ritchie is back as director, as are Downey and Law as Holmes and Watson.  Rachael McAdams is also back as Irene Adler, although McAdams has said that her role is very small this time out.


Joining them in this sequel are Noomi Rapace, star of the original Swedish The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, as Sim, a gypsy fortune teller who gets caught up in the evil plot.  Legendary British comedian and actor Stephen Fry is also on board as Sherlock's smarter brother Mycroft.  And rounding out the cast is Jared Harris, one of the stars of Mad Men, as Holmes's arch-enemy, Professor Moriarty. 

The plot has Holmes enlisted to solve the murder of the Crown Prince of Austria, and this turns out to be nothing but a small part in the latest evil plot devised by Moriarty.  Holmes and Watson are soon having all kinds of adventures across Europe as they seek out to apprehend Moriarty. 

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows hits theatres on December 16.  

High Water on the Athabasca River

I don't make YouTube videos as much as I used to, but today, I was inspired to grab the camera and start filming.

With all the rain in the area, the Athabasca River is at its highest levels in the history of ever, according to some of the locals.  Sections of the picnic areas are washed out, the Riverfront Campground is underwater, and for the first time I can remember, the river is touching the Riverfront Stage.

Here's the video of the super-high river.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon Review

 

My Transformers: Dark of the Moon review is now online!

Click here to read it!

And taking a look at my website, has it really been more than month since I put together a new episode of U62: The Targ?  Yes, it has.  My apologies to my 6 listeners.  This is the time of year when my day job gets super-busy, so I usually go on hiatus to focus on my day job.  At the very least, I think I owe you a proper season finale.  I'll do my best to get one together for next week!

Third Time Not Quite the Charm

Well, going all the way back to my 11th birthday, I do celebrate a bit of a tradition:  I see a movie on my birthday.  Of course, the lack of movie theaters in Athabasca generally means I get to see a movie on the weekend closest to my birthday, and thus declare that my "birthday movie."

I am back from the city, and back from this year's birthday movie:  Transformers: Dark of the Moon.  aka Transformers 3.

Yeah.

I don't know.  At this point in the franchise, Transformers are really starting to remind me of Godzilla movies.  The plot really, really drags when the humans are on screen.  I mean, it served a purpose in the first film.  The character of Sam represented the audience...new to this world of Autobots and Decepticons and thus serving as our eyes and ears.  But now, this far into the franchise, every time we cut away from Optimus Prime to Sam's wacky hijinks...it's just such a distraction.

This movie is way better than the second one, though.  There is more of a plot, rather than just random explosions happening all over the place.  The comedic relief still takes the form of very stupid comedy, but there's significantly less of it.  And there are few more nods to Transformers lore that were nice.  And there's one killer Star Trek reference that I won't get in to because it is somewhat spoilerish.

At the end of the day, the movie this most reminds me of is Terminator 3.  It's good for what it is, it's enjoyable, but really doesn't bring anything new to the table.  All of my childhood nostalgia was used up on the first film...the second film was so bad it burned up all my good will for the franchise...and the third one.  Well, it's good, I guess.

And what the hell is Buzz Aldrin doing in this film? 

And there was another moment...I know it was supposed to be this very emotional moment, but how it was carried out was so expertly spoofed in Team America: World Police that I couldn't help but laugh.

Yeah...look for a complete review on the main site in the next day or so.

In a way, it's not just the movie I'm reviewing.  I decided to pay the extra money and see the film in Cineplex's new and much hyped "UltraAVX" theatres.  They boast the biggest non-IMAX screen you can get, the most state-of-the-art digital projectors and sound systems, bigger, comfier, leather reclining seats, and reserved seating.  It's costs $5 more than 2D movie ticket...$2 more than a 3D movie ticket.

And the truth is...I don't think it really added anything more to the movie-going experience.

Yeah, the bigger screen was nice, but it's not that much bigger than a typical screen.  I don't think the seats really were any more comfy than typical movie theatre seats.

However, I did love the concept of the reserved seating in this case.  I don't know about you, but whenever I've gone to see a movie in 3D, the ticket-taker who hands me my 3D glasses tells me that the best place to sit is as close to the centre of the theatre as possible to get the full 3D effect.  Well, even when I show up a half-hour before showtime, I'll find that all the good seats in the centre of the theatre are taken, so I wind up sitting at the side.

But thanks to reserve seating, I was able to stake out the best seats in the dead centre of the theatre and fully enjoy the 3D show.

So my final verdict on UltraAVX.  If you're going to see a movie in good old fashioned 2D, it's not worth the extra $5.  But, if you're going for 3D, it is worth the extra $2 to guarantee yourself a good seat.

Also, while in the city, I swung by HMV and treated myself to some new CDs.  Way back when I was but a wee lad in Entwistle, my holy grail of albums was always the soundtrack to The Transformers: The Movie.  (aka the original 1986 animated film)  Never got my hands on it until college.  So, the lingering after effect of that is I've bought the soundtracks for every Transformers film.  So, of course, I had to grab the soundtrack for Dark of the Moon.  It's like the first two soundtracks...full of Linkin Park-y goodness.

I also wound up grabbing the soundtrack for Cars 2.  I haven't seen Cars 2 yet.  I was thinking about seeing it today after Transformers, but dude, Transformers is damn near 3 hours long, and when it was done, I saw far too much of my afternoon was gone.

The soundtrack for Cars 2 is OK.  The main theme is the 1980s classic You Might Think as covered by Weezer.  No doubt, it was chosen for this soundtrack because of the song's original artists, the Cars.

There's also a cut called Collision of Worlds, which is duet between country music star Brad Paisley and Brit pop legend Robbie Williams.  I was curious to hear what this bizarre pairing would produce, but it turned out to be just one of laziest songs ever written for a movie, as all they really do is rattle off a list of American deep South and British slang terms.







There's also a tradition French song and some peppy J-Pop to help add the international flavour of the globetrotting adventures in the film.

However, the main reason why I bought this was for the score as composed by Michael Giacchino.  I've geek out about Giacchino on the blog in the past, and how I think he's one of the greatest film composers working today.  I think he's done spectacular work for Pixar (with The Incredibles, Ratatouille, and his Oscar-winning score for Up), so I was curious to hear what he'd come up with on his fourth outing with Pixar. 

And once again, Giacchino does not disappoint.  No doubt, Giacchino got the gig for the same reason he got The Incredibles:  since the plot borrows from the classic James Bond spy films, they wanted a score that would replicate that classic James Bond sound.  And the James Bond sound is in full force, thanks to the heavy guitars just like in the James Bond theme.

There's also a few cues that seem to harken back to classic Disney films, and I swear that, given the film's subject matter, I could pick up on a few echos of Giacchino's Speed Racer score.  I was listening to it on the drive home, and I was smiling all the way.  Giacchino has composed another winner. 

And, as I reflect on day in the city, I once again lament that flirting is a skill I've never really developed.  So there I am at HMV.  The clerk is ringing me up.  She asks if I want to sign up for their rewards program.  I say no.  She says if I want to hear the sales pitch.  I say no.  She asks why I always say no.  I mumble something about being not interested. 

As I leave and head out into the mall, I start thinking, "Damn it!  Why did I say that?  She was cute!  I should have said something like, 'Well, it's because I never heard the sales pitch from someone as lovely as you.'  Yeah, it's cheezy as hell, but it's better than mumbling 'Not interested!'". 

I need, like, a practice dummy or something that I can practice flirting with.  Wait a minute.  They do make practice dummies.  They're called blow-up dolls.

OK, this is taking a weird turn.  As they taught me in broadcast school, when you don't have anything to say, just shut up and play the next song.

Mission: Impossible 4 Trailer

The trailer for Mission: Impossible -- Ghost Protocol just went online.  I've watched it several times and it made me geek out all over, so of course, I had to share.

"Now Mark," you're probably thinking.  "Why the heck would you geek out over some stupid little Tom Cruise spy movie?"  I'm getting all nuts for this one because of the director...Brad Bird.

You heard me right.  Brad Bird.  The director of the Oscar-winning Pixar films The Incredibles and Ratatouille...the director of my all-time favourite film, The Iron Giant...is making his live action debut with Mission: Impossible 4. 

Originally, Bird was going to make his live-action debut with the historical epic 1906, about the earthquakes and fires that destroyed San Fransisco in 1906, but the studios deemed it too big and too expensive for a first-time live-action director.  So, he got the job to do the next Mission: Impossible film.

J.J. Abrams, who directed Super 8, the Star Trek reboot, and Mission: Impossible III, is back on board as producer and co-writer.  Abrams wrote the script along with his former Alias writers Andre Nemec and Josh Appelbaum. 

Mission: Impossible -- Ghost Protocol hits theatres December 16.

Stuff for Tuesday!

So, there's a few things that crossed my mind yesterday that I felt I should, nay, needed to share with the world.

First up, you may remember, back on Thursday, I was geeking out about the all the new information released on Pixar's epic for 2012, Brave.  Well, as expected, when Cars 2 hit theatres on Friday, the first teaser was in front.  And here it is!







As previously mentioned, it hits theatres next June.

Next up, there was a Blu-Ray announcement yesterday that had me geeking out.  Coming out on October 25, just in time for Christmas, for the first time on Blu-Ray, The Jurassic Park Trilogy.

The big boxed set contains all three films (Jurassic Park, The Lost World: Jurassic Park, and Jurassic Park III).  You get ALL of the bonus features from the previous DVDs, and brand new to this set is the all new, 6-part documentary Return to Jurassic Park, which features brand new interviews with the cast and crew, including director Steven Spielberg.  The Blu-Ray set will be available in two versions:  regular, and "box full of swag," which has a little statue of the T-Rex bursting through those legendary "Jurassic Park" front gates.

The only film I have of the trilogy on DVD is Jurassic Park, and I've been thinking about succumbing to the double-dip for quite some time.  When the DVD was first released, it was released in two versions:  the regular Dolby Sound edition, and the DTS edition.  On the DTS edition, in order to make room for the DTS soundtrack, they wound up removing pretty much all of the bonus features.  And then, they discovered an error in the DTS soundtrack, and issued a recall on the disc.

I have the DTS edition, and I didn't notice I had the pre-recall version until it was too late to get my free replacement.

So, yeah.  I think this is one worth the upgrade to Blu.

Man o man, The Lord of the Rings: Extended Editions hit Blu-Ray today, The Superman Anthology came out a month ago, The Star Wars Saga comes out this September, and now this...2011 is turning into one damn expensive year.

And speaking of Star Wars, I caught a little bit of The Phantom Menace on TV last night.  And it got me to thinking about the upcoming Blu-Ray...I wonder if the Blu-Ray will have the "digital Yoda" version of The Phantom Menace?

For those who don't care, when Lucas was making The Phantom Menace, he felt that the computer animation technology wasn't quite there yet to do a fully computer animated Yoda, so most of Yoda's scenes were done the old fashioned way:  with a puppet.  Yeah, they attempted a computer animated Yoda in some long shots, but it's pretty much all puppet Yoda in The Phantom Menace.

When production started on Attack of the Clones, making Yoda completely computer animated was a top priority.  To test out their new animation software, and to get the animators all warmed up for animating Yoda, the computer animators went back into The Phantom Menace, digitally removed puppet Yoda, and replaced it with a completely computer animated digital Yoda.

Obviously, the "digital Yoda" version of The Phantom Menace is George Lucas's preferred version, as whenever someone wants a clip of The Phantom Menace for some Star Wars retrospective, Lucas sends them a clip featuring digital Yoda.  But the entire digital Yoda version of The Phantom Menace has yet to be released.

I exchanged a few text messages with some of the more hardcore Star Wars fans I know, and it's pretty much agreed that when The Phantom Menace hits Blu-Ray, it will most likely be the digital Yoda version.

It makes me wonder what other new "Special Edition" tweaks Lucas will be making for the Blu-Rays....

McRibbed For Your Pleasure

Well, it's that magical time.  McDonald's has decided to bring back one of their cult following sandwiches for the summer.  Folks, in case the Double Down has been stealing all the limelight, may I take a moment to remind you that the McRib is back?

That's not from my cellphone cam...I brought my real camera down to McDonald's to get a good picture

What is it about this burger-like creation?  What is it that drives people mad for it?

Because I tell you, I have one every time McDonald's brings it back, and one is usually enough.  I mean, we always rally against fast food and how it tastes so plastic and artificial and processed...no fast food creation tastes more plastic and artificial and processed than the McRib. 

For those who've never had the pleasure, the McRib is a pork (or, at the very least, pork-like) patty smothered in BBQ sauce and topped with pickles and onions on a sesame seed roll.

Introduced at McDonald's in 1981, it tested well enough that they added it to the regular menu.  However, sales were always sluggish, and it was removed from the regular menu in 1985.  It's been a seasonal item ever since.  Last time McDonald's had it here in Canada was around three years ago.  Before that...wow, I think it was the tie-in to the live-action Flintstones movie back in 1994. 

The McRib has become a pop culture icon.  Who can forget that classic Simpsons episode where Homer goes across the USA tracking down the "Ribwich."  So what is it about it that makes the McRib so beloved?

The taste sensation that people kill for

I think that, at the end of the day, it's not taste that make people crave the McRib.  It's the marketing.  It's the whole limited time ploy.  Get one now, because it'll be gone next week.  If you don't act on your impulses and get a McRib today, you'll have to repress yourself for the next five years! 

So, yeah.  Get it before it's gone.  Five little words that make me buy a lot more than I really should.

Pixar Miscellany

You know me, I'm a big Pixar fanboy, which is why I'll probably be heading out to see Cars 2 before the summer is done...even though the trailers look a little too fart-joke-centric.

But, with the forthcoming release of Cars 2, we're getting a whole bevy of Pixar news.

First up, as is Pixar tradition, the first teaser trailer for their next film will be in front of Cars 2.  They're next one is called Brave.  It comes out next summer, and we've also got the first teaser poster.

Brave is Pixar's first stab at doing a fairy tale.  Set in medieval Scotland, it follows the adventures of Princess Merida, an accomplished archer whose young headstrong ways soon brings turmoil to her kingdom, and she has to embark on a quest to set things right.

Brave is also notable in that it'll be Pixar's first film with a female protagonist.  For a time, there, it was also going to be Pixar's first film with a female director, Brenda Chapman.  However, back in the fall, Chapman was removed from the project and replaced with Mark Andrews.  For all her hard work on the film to date, Chapman is still getting a co-director credit.  And, as she conceived the original story, she's also still getting a "written by" credit.

As for the voices, Merida will be voiced by Scottish actress Kelly Macdonald.  Her parents, King Fergus and Queen Elinor, will be voiced by Billy Connolly and Emma Thompson.  Comic relief in the film comes from the three lords of the kingdom, Lord MacGuffin, Lord Macintosh, and Lord Dingwall, to be voiced by Kevin McKidd, Craig Ferguson, and Robbie Coltrane.  Nice to see that Pixar learned the lesson from Finding Nemo and are trying to get real accents instead of people to fake them. 

(There's this bonus feature on the Finding Nemo DVD where they take the fake Australian accents that the animators used in the story reel and compared them to the real Australian accents used by the real Australian actors who voiced the characters in the final film and yeah...the difference is pretty noticable.)

Brave hits theatres on June 22, 2012.

As for the rest of the Pixar slate, Monster University, the prequel to Monsters, Inc, will be hitting theatres in Summer of 2013. 

And the one that has everyone scratching their heads right now is the mystery project coming out in November of 2013.  When Pixar made the announcement earlier this week, no title was announced, no plot information was revealed, none of the attached talent was discussed...just that they have a film scheduled for release on November 27, 2013.  Pete Docter, the director of Up, has apparently been cooking up something, and the rampant speculation says this is Docter's next project. 

The Coming of the Alpocalypse!

This is it!  The big day is here!  "Weird Al" Yankovic's new album, Alpocalypse, comes out today!  Stupid Canada Post strike...I pre-ordered my copy on Amazon.ca a month ago!  Who knows when the hell it's going to arrive now?

Oh, well.  At least Weird Al has me covered.  He released the video for his lead single, Perform This Way, yesterday!  As you may recall, 'tis a parody of Lady Gaga's Born This Way.

My thoughts...meh.  As I kinda blogged when he first leaked Perform This Way to the Internet, there's a whole feeling of, "I'm parodying this because I have to," to this, and as such, it just feels like it's lacking...something.  Maybe it's because Lady Gaga is too easy a target, making the jokes seem too easy.  I don't know.  It's good, but I don't think it's one of Weird Al's best.

I've watched this a few times, now, and I'm starting to wonder if Weird Al had his head digitally superimposed on a woman's body.  There's just some scenes in there where his bangs float over his forehead in a weird way, and the head just doesn't seem proportioned to the body.  

Oh, well.  I can still pass the time waiting for this Canada Post strike to end.  As previously announced, all of the songs on Weird Al's digital EP Internet Leaks were all the original songs on this new album.  Since I bought Internet Leaks when it first came out in 2009, I at least already own half of the album.  

Here's my favourite from the Internet Leaks  collection, and thus one of my favourites from Alpocalypse, and that's this little ditty called Skipper Dan:

Pathos from a Weird Al song. Whoda thunkit?

And lastly, it's just not a Weird Al album without a polka medley.  The new album has actually been streaming since last week, so the fan-made music videos are starting to pop up online.  Ladies and gents, here's Polka Face:





Now let's get this damn postal strike settled so my CD will arrive in the mail!

The Muppets Trailers

There's a new Muppet movie on the horizon!  I'm actually geeking out about this harder than I though I would.

There's a long and illustrious history as to how this new Muppet movie came to be.  Disney has been trying to buy the Muppets for quite some time.  Back in 1990, it looked like Disney and Jim Henson had finally inked a deal.  But then...the sudden and untimely passing of Jim Henson.  Disney cancelled the deal, so as not to look like graverobbers.   Disney and the Muppets still worked closely together, though, having produced the Muppet movies The Muppet Christmas Carol and Muppet Treasure Island, and the Muppet show revival Muppets Tonight.  Disney finally acquired the Muppets back in 2004, and they've been working to re-introduce the brand through TV specials and direct-to-DVD movies, such as The Muppets Wizard of Oz and the recent Christmas special, A Muppet Christmas: Letters to Santa.

Enter Jason Segel.  A few years back, Segel was the writer, producer, and star of a romantic comedy called Forgetting Sarah Marshall.  I've never seen the film, but apparently our protagonist -- Segel's character -- tries to forget Sarah Marshall by channeling his creative energy into creating a rock opera based on Dracula to be performed entirely with puppets.  When it came time to actually stage this for the film's conclusion, Segel contacted the Muppet folks.  The Muppet folks gladly obliged.  While they were filming the scene, Segel struck up a rapport with the Muppet folks, admitted his lifelong fandom for the Muppets, and before he knew it, he was in the head offices of Disney Studios pitching his idea for a new Muppet movie.  Disney gave the project the green light.  This was back in 2008 or so.  There have been many stops and starts in development, but when James Bobin, co-creator and director of the cult classic comedy Flight of the Conchords signed on to direct, and with a quick re-write of the script by the folks at Pixar, the final pieces fell into place, and filming began last fall.

The plot is thus:  our hero is Walter, a Muppet-looking fellow who is a lifelong fan of the Muppets, as they are the only people who know of who looks like him.  When Walter learns of a plan by the villainous Tex Richman to demolish the Muppet Theatre and drill for oil beneath, Walter sets out to reunite the Muppets and stage a show to raise the money to buy back the Muppet Theatre and stop Tex Richman.   Walter is joined in his quest by his best friend Gary (played by Segel) and Gary's girlfriend Mary (played by the always adorable Amy Adams).  Chris Cooper will be playing the evil Tex Richman.  It's just not a Muppet movie without celebrity cameos, and some of the known cameos include Jack Black, George Clooney, Billy Crystal, Neil Patrick Harris, and Ben Stiller.

So there's been a bunch of trailers released for The Muppets over the past few months.  The first one was a spoof of romantic comedy trailers, and was in front of Pirates of the Carribean: On Stranger Tides.








The second one was in front of The Hangover Part II, and was a spoof of the The Hangover Part II trailer. We also catch two of the celebrity cameos in this one: Wanda Sykes and Danny Trejo.






The third one rips on Green Lantern and was in front of Green Lantern:






Following the frustration of Segel's voice over in that one, we finally got a real trailer this past weekend. I'm guessing, it being a Disney production and all, it'll be in theatres in front of Cars 2 this Friday.






The Muppets hits theatres on November 23.

Green Lantern Review

 

So, my Green Lantern review is online over at my main site.

Head on over and let me know what you think!

Rainy Day Blues

Summer is always a very busy time at work, and it looks like this is going to be the last weekend to myself for a while, so I decided to head on into the city for the day. Wasn't really sure why...didn't have any goals to accomplish. All I know is, sometimes, it's nice to get away for a day.

Of course, one of my first stops was Best Buy. When I finally got my Internet connection at home, I was fascinated to see that my wireless router had a USB port on the back. According to the instruction manual, this is so you can plug in a frequently shared device -- such as a printer -- or a flash drive or external hard drive so it can serve as network storage. So, naturally, I wanted to get a cheap little flash drive to try this out. I've been finding that Best Buy seems to be the best place for cheap flash drives. Picked up a 4G for $10, which will serve me well for my experiments.

But yeah. It's all plugged into the wireless router and I have network storage. The question now is what to store on it.

And of course, off to go shopping for Blu-Rays. I've been depressed that past few times I've returned from the city without any new DVDs or Blu-Rays. In the long run, that's probably good, because it means I'm saving money. But still, it's a tough habit to break.

The Superman Motion Picture Anthology: 1978 - 2006 is something that came out last week, and I would love to get it.  This contains every Superman movie made...the Christopher Reeve ones and Bryan Singer's reboot from '06.  AND for the first two, you get both the original theatrical editions and the Richard Donner cuts.  As awesome as this would be in my DVD library, I'm still a little gunshy at $110 SRP.  Amazon.ca has it for $85, but still, dude, that's a lot of money.

But I was still able to get my DVD fix.  One of the first DVDs I ever bought was the Terminator 2: Ultimate Edition, and it always felt like there was a hole in my collection without The Terminator.  However, there are no super-special editions for The Terminator.  The only one came out in 2001, was a limited edition, and is long out of print.  However, I discovered that it was released on Blu-Ray just last week, in one of those conversation piece "book editions."  That should be pretty self-explanatory...the package is actually a nice little book about the movie.  I saw that and figured it was worthy of my collection.

I also picked up Apollo 13 on Blu-Ray.  I was blogging about a month ago that I discovered that my Apollo 13 DVD had fallen victim to disc rot, and is no longer playable in my Blu-Ray player.  I snatched my Apollo 13 DVD out of a discount bin for $10, so when I saw the Apollo 13 Blu-Ray in a discount bin for $12, I figured, "Yeah...I can buy a replacement." 

And to cap things off, I snatched up Wallace and Gromit: The Complete Collection.  This contains every Wallace and Gromit short film ever made!  Again, I originally had this on DVD.  However, though, between the release of the DVD and the invention of Blu-Ray, they made a fourth Wallace and Gromit short, entitled A Matter of Loaf and Death.  I figured the release of another Wallace and Gromit short made this worthy of the double-dip.  And hey, discount bin for just $15. 

And I guess I did have a goal in mind on this trip...I wanted to see Green Lantern.  You know me, I'm a sucker for superhero films.  And Green Lantern...well, it's not as bad as most of the critics are making it out to be.  It's just...meh. 

You know, it's long been said that the difference between Marvel and DC can be summed up in the old saying, "Some are born into greatness, others have it thrust upon them."  DC heroes are born into greatness, Marvel heroes have it thrust upon then.  So with Green Lantern, they changed Hal Jordan to a guy who has it thrust upon him, and as such, he spends too much time on Earth moping about whether he should be a hero or not.  It just...didn't work for me. 

And I actually burst out laughing at the film's climax.  One of my most hated cliches of superhero films reared its ugly head, and when I saw it, especially given the cosmic powers of our hero and villain, I just couldn't help but chuckle at how absurd it was. 

So, yeah.  Ultimately Green Lantern reminded me of the Fantastic Four films...they barely scratched the surface of this very rich comic book universe, instead giving us something that seems slapped together and phoned in in order to cash in on the current superhero trends. 

Look for a complete review over on the main page in the next day or so. 

Ghosts of Saturday Mornings Past

So, I'm spending another evening torturing myself by browsing through the Warner Archive Collection.  I think I've blogged about this in the past...it's a really neat concept.  Warner Brothers went through their archives and found a bunch of their classic films.  While they know there's a market to release these films on DVD, they know it's an incredibly small market, and really not worth it to produce the DVDs in mass quantities.  So, what they did was they converted these movies to digital files, and they make the DVDs to order.  That's right, they burn them on demand!

Granted, these DVDs have no bonus features, and they've done little to nothing in the way of digital restoration...just burned them to DVD straight from the highest quality source they could find.  But that's OK.  These are for cinephiles who wants these just because they never thought they'd see the light of DVD.

I have only one problem with the Warner Archive Collection:  THEY DON'T SHIP TO CANADA.  There's a few titles in there I'd love to get, but when it asks me for my address, it says, "Cannot ship to your location."  There's warnings all over that they only ship in the USA.  It's a very frustrating case of "look, but don't touch."  

And now, they're starting to dig through their animation archives, and starting to dig up some classic Hanna Barbera Saturday morning cartoons.

Man o man, this one was announced a few months ago, and I'd sure love to get it.  The definition of cheesy cartoon crossovers, The Jetsons Meet the Flintstones.  Thanks to Elroy Jetson's time machine gone awry, the Jetsons find themselves thrown back to prehistoric times, where they meet the Flintstones.  The Flintstones help the Jetsons adjust to the days of the caveman, and then the Flintstones are flung into the far future, where they quickly become the new mascots for Spacely's Sprockets.





It was made in the late-80s as part of this huge series of TV movies that Hanna-Barbera made, starring a bunch of their classic cartoon characters.  CBC showed them on Saturday mornings when I was a kid.  I'd watch them occasionally, as they nicely filled the void between CFRN's early morning of Masters of the Universe and The Smurfs, and ITV's afternoon of The Transformers, G.I. Joe, MASK, Visionaries, Jem, and everything else that made the 80s FREAKING AWESOME.  But yeah.  Among those movies, The Jetsons Meet the Flintstones is truly the best and most famous.

And then I start browsing some more, and I see they released The Dukes: The Complete Series.  Holy crap, they released The Dukes on DVD, better known as The Dukes of Hazzard cartoon.

At the height of The Dukes of Hazzard popularity in the early-80s, it actually spawned a Saturday morning animated spin-off known simply as The Dukes.  In grand Saturday morning cartoon style, Boss Hogg decides to end his long-standing feud with the Dukes once and for all by challenging the Dukes to a race around the world.  So Bo, Luke, and Daisy (and Coy and Vance in the early episodes, as this was made during the Coy and Vance era) hop in the General Lee and head off for Paris, London, Tokyo, and other exotic locales, with Boss Hogg and Roscoe in hot pursuit, cheating along the way to win the race.





I didn't get this cartoon on TV when I was a kid, but my grandparents did.  I have very fuzzy memories of watching it one Saturday morning when visiting my grandparents.  And I remember thinking it was incredibly cool.  I would get this purely on that fuzzy memory.

So, yeah.  Some of the things I'd be disposing my disposable income on if the Warner Archives shipped to Canada.  Those two...and Steel.  Come on!  Everyone should see the classic Shaq superhero epic!  Just to see what a train wreck it is.  

Ninja Turtles Return...Again

So...they're doing a new Ninja Turtles cartoon.

For those just coming in, about a year or two ago, Nickelodeon swooped in and bought the entire Ninja Turtles franchise.  They own all of it now.  And, of course, they're getting ready to bring it back in a big, bad way.  A new animated series is in production, to premiere in the fall of 2012, and today they unveiled the voice cast.  The new Turtles are....

Jason Biggs is Leonardo.  That's right, still best remembered as the guy who f--ked a pie in American Pie is now the leader of the TMNT.

Sean Astin is Raphael.  Astin, big child star in the 1980s, starred in The Goonies, his most recent big role was Samwise Gamgee in The Lord of the Rings trilogy.

Greg Cipes is Michelangelo.  Cipes, of course, a veteran voice actor who was Beast Boy in the Teen Titans cartoon. 

Now here's where things get surreal for me.

Legendary voice actor Rob Paulson is Donatello.  Paulson was Yakko on Animaniacs, Pinky on Pinky and the Brain, Arthur on The Tick, and...Raphael on the original Ninja Turtles cartoon.

That's right, the original Raphael is the new Donatello.  In the interview with Entertainment Weekly where this new voice cast was announced, Astin did say that it's kind of weird having the original voice there in the recording studio, and he would frequently end takes by turning to Paulson and going, "Umm...am I doing this right?" 

It's going to be quite the thing to see when it premieres in the fall of 2012.

The Alpocalypse Parodies

Just a little over a week to go before Weird Al's new album Alpocalypse comes out!  My copy is pre-ordered on Amazon.ca, and I can hardly wait for it arrive!

Anyway, starting to get a few comments on the blog telling me what songs Weird Al parodies on his new album.  Seeing as to how it's now part of the track listing on Amazon.ca and iTunes, I may as well share.

1)  Perform this Way - As previously revealed on YouTube a couple months ago, a parody of Born This Way from Lady Gaga.

3)  TMZ - From the title, it's obviously going to be about the gossip-sharing website.  It's going to be a parody of You Belong With Me from Taylor Swift.

5)  Polka Face - The polka medley.  I won't go into the list, but some of the songs in it are Poker Face, Womanizer, I Kissed a Girl, Fireflies, Need You Now and Justin Beiber's Baby.

7)  Party in the CIA - Riffing on Party in the USA from Miley Cyrus.  Weird Al's first parody of a Disney kid!

9)  Another Tattoo - Spoofing Nothin' On You by B.o.B. featuring Bruno Mars.  Hmmm...this is the only one where I`m not familiar with the original, so let`s try to find it on YouTube:







11)  Whatever You Like - Part of the Internet Leaks collection, parodying Whatever You Like from T.I.

Latest Targ's Up!

Are you ready for a new podcast?  Well, tough, because I've got one for you.

Episode 4.23: Grind Away gets back to the weekly grind of my podcast.  We're chatting about the new Nintendo system, we shine the spotlight on some lesser-known Batman villains, and Kevin Smith is getting into reality TV.



Give it a listen!

Click here to go download it!

Head here to subscribe in iTunes!

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Movie Review -- Green Lantern: Emerald Knights

So, DC Comics and Warner Brothers Animation has unleashed the latest in their series of direct-to-video animated films upon the world.  And, as is my way, I ran out and bought it and am spending the weekend watching it.  It's time to take a look at....

Green Lantern: Emerald Knights

Directed by Chris Berkeley, Lauren Montgomery, and Jay Olivia

Starring the voices of Nathan Fillion, Jason Isaacs, Elisabeth Moss, Kelly Hu, Arnold Vosloo, Henry Rollins, and Roddy Piper.  

Backstory:  So, Warner Brothers made the decision that, since only the Batman and Superman animated films sold huge numbers, they'd only make movies about Batman and Superman.  But hey!  There's a Green Lantern movie hitting theatres in another week!  So, they got the go ahead to make a Green Lantern animated film as part of the merchandise tie-in.  They decided to go the route of the similarly titled Batman: Gotham Knight and tell a series of short stories focusing on the wide array of heroes that populate the Green Lantern Corp.  Is this little more than another piece of merchandise, or does it rise above and become it's own film?

Plot:  The villain Krona is preparing to launch an onslaught on the Green Lantern's home planet of Oa.  The rookie Green Lantern Arisia is nervous on the eve of her first battle, so Hal Jordan calms her nerves and inspires her with tales of some of the other Green Lanterns.  The tales are:

• The First Lantern - The saga of Avra, a lowly scribe chosen to be the first Green Lantern, and how he unlocked the true power of the power rings.
• Killowog - The tale of the Green Lantern's drill sergeant Killowog, and how he became the hard-ass DI he's known for.
• Laira - The warrior Lantern Laira, and her first solo mission, where she's sent to reign in an evil despot who's conquered her own planet.  And the despot turns out to be...her father.
• Mogo Doesn't Socialize - Based on the classic Alan Moore/Dave Gibbons tale, the warrior Bolphunga the Unrelenting goes off to battle Mogo, the greatest Green Lantern of them all.  But when Bolphunga does find Mogo, it's a bit more than he bargained for.  
• Abin Sur - One of the adventures of Abin Sur, the Lantern before Hal Jordan, as he engages in philosophical debates with Sinestro and learns the ultimate fate of the Green Lantern Corp.  

The final tale, Emerald Knights, catches up with Arisia, as she enters the battle against Krona.  Will she be able to defeat this enemy and write her own chapter in Green Lantern history?

What I Liked:  There's some great outer space action set pieces in this.  As with most of the DC/WB productions, the voice acting is top-notch.  Bolphunga is voiced by wrestling legend Roddy Piper, and the challenges he issues are pure wrestling bluster.  It was great. 

What I Didn't Like:  Well, they used all the same character designs as the other Green Lantern film, First Flight, so I don't know why they just didn't go all the way and make this an official sequel, but they didn't so there ya go. 

Final Verdict:  It's tough to put my finger on.  I wanted to like this one more, but I'm just kind of walking from it going, "Meh."  It doesn't feel like they put a lot of effort into this one.

2.5 Nibs

Bonus Features:  On the Blu-Ray, you get an interview with comic book writer Geoff Johns about how awesome Green Lantern is, a featurette on the history of the Green Lantern Corp, a running commentary with Johns and DC's editor Dan DiDio, a virtual comic, two character profiles on Abin Sur and Laira, 2 Green Lantern-centric episodes of Batman: The Brave and the Bold, and a preview of the next animated film, Batman: Year One. 

Revising the Blog and More Smurfs!

So, for those who might not know me personally, I've got my Internet hooked back up at home again.  Yay!

And with that done, I started looking at this blog, and thinking it might be time to re-design the layout again.

I liked the old layout, but I wanted something a little bit wider so it's I can more easily embed the movie trailers that I like to rip apart. 

So let's see if this is wide enough.  Here's the latest trailer for The Smurfs. 





As I was telling a colleague not too long ago, there's a great movie to be made from The Smurfs, but this isn't it.

Let's try with another trailer...here's The Adventures of Tintin: The Secret of the Unicorn





To quote The Simpsons: "I thought these comics were only available in French class!"

Steven Spielberg tries his hand at performance capture to bring this movie version of the world-famous comic book. Peter Jackson of The Lord of the Rings is on board as producer, and current Doctor Who showrunner Steven Moffet along with Shaun of the Dead and Scott Pilgrim vs. the World director Edgar Wright wrote the script. It's due out this Christmas.

But yeah. I think this new format will work just fine.

The Targ Returns!

I'm back, baby cakes!  It's been two months and an episode of U62: The Targ was screaming to get out!

Episode 4.22: Yet Another Return explains where I've been...again.  We also talk about Weird Al's new album, discuss the big hockey story of the week, and try to get to the bottom of one of the best-known urban legends.



Give it a listen!

Click here to go download it!

Head here to subscribe in iTunes!

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X-Men: First Class Review

Well, gang, I've finally got my Internet back up and running at home!  Oh, it's great to have Internet access at home again.  Not that I didn't like going down to the library to check my e-mail and paying my bills in person at the bank...I was starting to like the human contact.  Maybe I'll keep doing it.


Anyway, I wound up buying a wireless router that I didn't need, so I went into the city today to take that back.  And while I was in the city, I decided to stay in and watch....

X-Men: First Class, the latest in the X-Men franchise.  As you know, I'm a sucker for all these superhero films, and I really love the novelty of a period superhero film, so when I first heard this was set in the 1960s, I was intrigued.  When Matthew Vaughn, the director of Kick-Ass, signed on to direct, I was even more intrigued.  And the hat trick was scored by Bryan Singer, returning to the franchise in the position of co-writer and producer.

So, what did I think of this latest installment?  Well, being online at home again means my official website is back up and running, so head on over to my movie reviews page to read my review!

Oh, and with my website back up and running, you'll see I've copy-and-pasted my Thor review over there as well. 

Ultravox

I've still got no Internet at home...Telus keeps telling me that my street has never, ever been wired for phone service.  But when I plug a phone into the wall, I get a dial tone.  What the h?

I think my next step will be talk to with my landlord...he's always been a do-it-yourselfer, so perhaps he wired in the basement suite wrong.  Maybe that dial tone I keep hearing is a neighbour's signal I'm picking up by accident. 

I should get my mind off it...go see a movie.  For a while now, I'm been seeing ads for the "UltraAVX" things at Cineplex theatres, and I've been wondering what it's about.  So, I've been doing some digging.

Essentially, "UltraAVX" is the Cineplex brand name for the "luxury theatre" concept I've been hearing about.  You've got super-wide, overstuffed recliners for your theatre seats.  It's got reserved seating...that means each seat has a number, and you are assigned a seat.  They say the screen takes up the entire wall, and they boast the most state-of-the-art digital projectors and sound systems. 

Cineplex prices are currently thus:

$12.75 for a regular 2D film.

$15.75 for a 3D film.

$17.75 for UltraAVX

Is it really worth a full $5 more for this experience?  Maybe I'll treat myself to one this summer just to see for sure. 

My Thoughts on the Smallville Finale

Despite the fact that I’m a bit of a comic book geek, and I’ve always leaned towards DC, I’ve never been more than a casual fan of Smallville. At the outset, it seemed like a good idea: Clark Kent’s teen years, as his powers first start kicking in and he starts out on the path to becoming Superman. But, like a lot of people, I found the whole “will they or won’t they” romance between Clark and Lana Lang to go on for too long and get too drawn out and annoying as hell. Plus, those early seasons really fell into a “monster of the week” kind of format, and it got formulaic really quick.


As I’ve blogged many times before, what brought me back – what was the one thing that made Smallville compelling to me – was watching Lex Luthor’s descent to the dark side. Every heartbreak, every twinge of paranoia that his best buddy Clark was keeping something from him, the pressure from his father to be this great modern-day conqueror/captain of industry...it was all adding up and serving to blacken his soul. And because it was episodic television, that descent to the dark side was painfully slow. Lex Luthor was what made that show for me.

And, well, because my earliest conscious memories of television are of watching The Dukes of Hazzard, it was also kind of neat to see Bo Duke as Pa Kent.

When Lex Luthor left, I pretty much gave up on the show completely. I’d tune in whenever I heard that some classic Superman villain was being introduced with a new twist, or some other superhero was making a guest appearance. I think the last time I actually sat down and watched it was last year’s epic 2-hour episode with the Justice Society of America. I heard that this was the final season, so I figured if I was going to watch just one last episode, it may as well be the final episode.

So, apparently, Clark Kent and Lois Lane are getting married. Or, they aren’t now, as Lois has decided not go through with it so Clark can be free to be a superhero. Clark’s not buying it. And the first 45 minutes of this 2-hour final episode is nothing but the “will they or won’t they” romantic crap that made this series so grating in the first place. What is notable, though, in order to start his new life with Lois and as a hero, Clark has decided to cut ties with his past completely, and this is not sitting well with the spirits of his two father: Jonathon Kent and Jor-El.

Apparently, the big bad for this final season was none other than the personification of all evil in the DCU, Darkseid, and he’s possessed Oliver Queen, and Oliver is seeking to sabotage the wedding. He’s replaced Clark’s wedding ring with one made of gold kryptonite, which has the power to permanently remove Clark Kent’s powers.

So, the wedding is going ahead, Chloe notices that Oliver, in his role as best man, has gotten a different ring for the groom. So, she stops the wedding, the church is evacuated, and Clark Kent and Oliver Queen throw down and Clark drives the evil from Oliver. They look up into the sky to see Darkseid’s home planet of Apokalypse descending on the Earth. End part 1.

Part 2, our heroes have gathered and are determining what to do. Tess Mercer – who is, apparently, Lex Luthor’s sister, is heading off to help our heroes but is mysteriously abducted. As I said, casual fan, so a lot of this continuity is lost to me. They make a plan. Clark talks with the spirit of Jonathon Kent, saying he was wrong to try to turn his back on his past, and he needs his father’s guidance more than ever. Pa Kent says that yes, Clark does need his father’s guidance on this...his other father, Jor-El. So, does Clark head on up to the Fortress of Solitude, get Jor-El’s advice, become Superman, and start kicking ass and saving the world? Nope. He goes looking for Tess.

Tess, as it turns out, was abducted by Lionel Luthor. I thought he died, but as I said, I’m pretty much just tuning in. Turns out Lionel has been cloning a new body for Lex (they wrote him out of the show by killing him off), but the one thing they still haven’t gotten right in this new clone body is a heart, so they seek to harvest Tess’s. Tess, however, kicks ass, frees herself, and shoots her father in his shoulder as she makes her escape. Lionel’s body, slowly losing life, crawls towards the currently lifeless body of Lex. Darkseid appears to Lionel, and Lionel sells his soul to Darkseid so Lex may live.

In his search for Tess, Clark goes to the burnt-out ruins of Luthor Manor. Remember those scenes in the show that quickly became cliché, where Clark would burst into Lex’s office in the Manor and confront Lex with the details of Lex’s evil plan, and Lex would just sit there all smug and evil? Well, we’re treated to one last one. As I said, Lex was always the most compelling character to me, so I was looking forward to this. Lex goes on to state his new philosophy, that he once thought people were defined by their friends or families, but he finally accepts that people are defined by their enemies, so he dedicates his life to being an enemy of Clark Kent’s. I half-expected him to quote the Joker from The Dark Knight: “I expect we’ll be doing this dance for years.” And Clark’s final line to Lex seemed somewhat poignant: “I’m sorry I couldn’t save you, Lex.”

Finally, Clark’s going to go to the Fortress of Solitude! He goes back to his old barn in Smallville to get the crystal that activates the Fortress, but he’s confronted by Darkseid, possessing Lionel Luthor’s body. Darkseid knows Clark is the only one that can stop him, and Darkseid throws Clark through a wall. Clark freezes in midair, and we retreat into his mind where he talks with Jor-El. We’re treated to a montage of all of Clark’s heroics throughout the series, and Clark finally understands that these were trials from him to prove his worthiness as a hero. Jor-El says Clark has been a hero all along. We then come out of this astral plane, and see that Clark did not freeze in midair...he’s floating.

That’s right, after every other Kryptonian who arrived on Earth and figured it out instantly...after every evil entity that possessed Clark was able to figure it out instantly...Clark Kent finally figured out how to fly. He takes out Darkseid with a flying punch, and flies north to the Fortress of Solitude.

In the Fortress, Clark communes with Jor-El and realizes that he must also accept his Kryptonian heritage to become the hero he’s destined to be. Jor-El admits his pride in his son, and says that Clark is ready. Jor-El says that while it’s Clark’s Kryptonian heritage that gives him his powers, it was Clark’s life in Smallville that made him a hero. The spirit of Jonathon Kent appears to present Clark with...the suit. Clark suits up, finally becomes Superman, and flies off to save the world.

Hey, what happened to Tess after she escaped from Lionel? Turns out she tracked down Lex in the Luthorcorp offices. Brother and sister have on last moment, in which Lex kills Tess. But, with her dying breath, Tess smears a neurotoxin on Lex’s face. This toxin will wipe out all of Lex’s memories. So Lex’s knowledge of Clark Kent’s powers...Lex’s tragic childhood...all of it, gone from Lex’s memories. I was really starting to wonder how they’d get rid of Lex’s knowledge of Clark Kent’s true identity, so I’m glad they remembered to do something about that in this final episode. With his memories gone, and nothing but a dark heart remaining, Lex Luthor looks out at the world. The gravitational forces of Apokolypse being so close to Earth smashes some of the letters in the “Luthorcorp” sign on the roof of the Luthorcorp tower. The remaining letters spell out “Lexcorp.”

We catch up with Superman. He saves Air Force One, and Lois Lane is on board, so she gets to break the story of Superman’s revelation to the world. Superman hurls Apokolypse into the darkest reaches of space. And Superman looks down on the world and prepares for his destiny. We never see Superman in close-up, though...just in wide shots, with his cape flapping in the breeze.

And here’s where things turn into total fan service.

The traditional score of the series fades away. They start recycling the classic John Williams score from the Richard Donner film. We flash forward seven years, and see that this entire episode has been a bedtime story that Chloe was reading to her young son. Apparently, Chloe married Oliver and is in the throes of living happily ever after. (I have to put on my Continuity Cop cap and point out that Green Arrow’s one true love is Black Canary, but whatever.) With her son down for the night, Chloe phones her cousin Lois Lane in Metropolis.

Lois Lane is an ace reporter at the Daily Planet. Perry White is angry as usual as Lois is missing her deadlines. Lois dispenses some advice to the recently-hired Jimmy Olson.

(“Hey,” you might be thinking. “Jimmy Olson was a regular character a few seasons back, and they killed him off. What the what?” Well, in Jimmy’s final appearance, they revealed that he was actually the older brother of the real Jimmy Olson, and the younger Jimmy decided to take his older brother’s name and follow in his legacy. Lois reaffirms this by telling Jimmy he’s got a long way to go to fill the shoes of his big brother.)

We see a shot of a TV monitor that announces Lex Luthor has just been elected President of the United States. Lois bumps into Clark in the hallway, and we learn that they’ve been putting off their wedding for the last seven years, because Clark always gets called away to perform superheroics...but they’re good to go for tonight! Just then, a Daily Planet staffer yells out that terrorists are threatening to blow up a building in downtown Metropolis. Clark tells Lois he might be a few minutes late, and runs up to the roof.

The classic John Williams Superman theme kicks in. Clark Kent goes through the classic transformation of removing his glasses and tearing open his shirt to reveal the Superman logo. We hold on the logo, and the end credits roll in the style of the classic Richard Donner film.

And that’s the end of Smallville. It was pretty good. Not going to lie, I stood up and cheered when Clark finally discovered how to fly. The references to Darkseid, and all the other references to the Superman mythology, as always, made me squee. But that first 45-minutes was a painful reminder of why the show started getting on my nerves.

It’s over now. Maybe someday I’ll pick up the DVDs and acquaint myself with the show properly. But all in all, it was a good ride.

Thor Review

I got a text from a friend the other day lamenting that my online presence has become somewhat scant as of late. I haven’t done the podcast in about six weeks, and my blog entries are become fewer and further between. Well, that’s all easy enough to explain.


For those just tuning in, I currently have no Internet access at home. My upstairs neighbours used to let me use their Internet connection. I’d give them $20 a month, and they’d give me the password for the wireless router. Well, they moved out almost two months ago, and I haven’t been able to get my own Internet connection yet. The reasons for not having it back are about 80% my own procrastination, and 20% poor customer service from the only ISP that serves Athabasca when I’m able to get them on the phone.

It’s kind of interesting that this situation is very similar to the one that caused me to start this blog. Around 8 years ago or so, my laptop crashed, and I had no way to get online at home. Maintaining an online presence was very important to me back then, so I went to Blogger, which was the popular blogging service among my friends at the time, and got myself a blog. I figured it would be quick and easy to update at libraries and Internet cafes and thus maintain my online presence. 8 years later now, and I’m still blogging.

So maybe it’s time to bring this blog back to its original purpose...something quick and easy to update at the library until I get my connection back at home. Although, if you really are craving some kind of Internet-based entertainment from me, I find that Facebook and Twitter are really quick and easy to update from my BlackBerry. I’m still very active at those social networking sites, so you might want to consider friending me or following me.

But yeah...not much to write home about. I had a wonderful day in Edmonton today. With the weather getting really warm right now, I figured I needed a new pair of shoes for walking around. I’ve always wanted a bigger memory card for my digital camera, and when I spotted an 8G card on sale for $10, I snapped one up. Oh, and I wanted to see Thor.

Since I can’t update my website, let’s blog my review of Thor!

Thor

Directed by Kenneth Branagh

Starring Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, Tom Hiddleston, Anthony Hopkins, Stellan Skarsgard, Kat Dennings, Clark Gregg, Idris Elba, Colm Feore, and Jamie Alexander
Backstory:
Man o man, superheroes have dominated the box office for the past few years, and because I’m a sucker for all the superhero stuff, I try to see them all. And now we have issue 2 of Marvel’s big crossover event. Issue 1 was Iron Man 2 last year, issue 2 is Thor, issue 3 is Captain America coming out this July, and issue 4 is going to be The Avengers, the gigantic superhero team consisting of Iron Man, Thor, and Captain America, coming out next summer. So, does Thor work on its own, or does it have the same problem many had with Iron Man 2, which was too much set-up for The Avengers?

Plot:
In the mystical realm of Aasgard, the gods of Norse mythology reside. As Thor is about to be crowned king by Odin, Frost Giants attack, and Thor decides to wipe out all the Frost Giants. This leads to a new war with the Frost Giants, and for this insolence, Odin strips Thor of his powers and banishes him to Earth. On Earth, Thor experiences a bit of culture shock as he gets used to being depowered and this simple Earth-dwellers, but with the help of the three astrophysicists studying the wormhole he fell out of, he begins to adjust. He even falls in love with one of them, Jane Foster. Meanwhile, in Aasgard, Loki takes advantage of the situation to seize the throne. But Loki knows that, should Thor ever return, it ruin his plans. Can Thor regain his powers, save Earth, and then reclaim the throne of Aasgard?

What I Liked:
Aasgard looks amazing. I’m constantly blown away at what computer animation is doing these days to create these otherworldly realms. The acting, too, is incredibly good, with Chris Hemsworth being wonderfully boisterous and then very sorrowful as Thor. The comedy, I’m glad to report, is not as stupid as the commercial play it out, and it does provide some very good laughs. And Loki is a very intriguing villain, but that does lead into....

What I Didn’t Like:
Loki is a very complicated villain, and as such, it’s tough to get a handle on what his evil scheme is. The film does drag a little bit when it comes to Earth. And the romance between Thor and Jane...well, it just happens so fast that it’s almost unexpected. It’s almost one of those, “We have to, I guess, because it happens in the comics” kind of things.

Final Verdict:
A very satisfying, if somewhat clichéd, superhero yarn. A friend asked where this ranks with the other Marvel films, and I’d say it’s on par with The Incredible Hulk.

3 Nibs

Star Wars Blu-Ray Specs!

Well, today is Star Wars Day.  For those who aren't in the loop, May 4th is Star Wars Day because Star Wars fans the world over will be tweeting "May the Fourth be with you." 

I don't know, dude.  When it comes to being a Star Wars fan, I'm just burnt out.  I really can't care any more.  I blame the Clone Wars movie.  God, that movie was so bad....  I've been told the series has gotten a lot better, but the movie sucked so much, I've never bothered to tune in. 

That being said, though, I did pre-order my set of set of Star Wars Blu-Rays as soon as Lucasfilm announced it back in January.  The specs --  the listing of all the bonus features -- wasn't announced at the time, saying that they would be announced at a later date.  Well, Lucasfilm chose Star Wars Day to be that later date.  Here's what you're going to get on the 9-disc "Infinite Saga" set of the Star Wars films. 

Disc 1: The Phantom Menace - The original running commentary from the DVD, and a new running commentary made of archival interviews with the cast and crew.

Disc 2: Attack of the Clones - The original running commentary from the DVD, and a new running commentary made of archival interviews with the cast and crew.

Disc 3: Revenge of the Sith - The original running commentary from the DVD, and a new running commentary made of archival interviews with the cast and crew.

Disc 4: A New Hope - The original running commentary from the DVD, and a new running commentary made of archival interviews with the cast and crew.

Disc 5: The Empire Strikes Back - The original running commentary from the DVD, and a new running commentary made of archival interviews with the cast and crew.

Disc 6: Return of the Jedi - The original running commentary from the DVD, and a new running commentary made of archival interviews with the cast and crew.

Disc 7: Star Wars Archives: Episodes I - III -- Deleted scenes, concept art, interviews with the cast and crew, featurettes on the making of the prequels...everything to do with the prequels is on this disc.

Disc 8: Star Wars Archives: Episodes IV - VI -- Same thing as Disc 7, only all pertaining to the original trilogy.

Disc 9: Star Wars Documentaries: A collection of documentaries about the saga, including new ones made for the Blu-Ray, and old ones getting re-released for the first time. The documentaries include:

• Star Warriors - This 90 minute documentary chronicles the 501st Legion Star Wars fanclub/service organization
• A Conversation With the Masters: The Empire Strikes Back 30 Years Later - This half-hour is a round table discussion with George Lucas, ESB co-writer Lawrence Kasdan, ESB director Irvin Kirshner, and composer John Williams, as they reminisce about ESB. Filmed last year, before Kirshner's death.
• Star Wars Spoofs - A 90 minute compilation of all the Star Wars spoofs out there, including clips from the Simpsons, Family Guy, and yes, even Weird Al's complete music video for The Saga Begins.
• The Making of Star Wars - The original TV special from 1977
• Empire Strikes Back: SPFX - The original "making of" TV special from 1980
• Classic Creatures: Return of the Jedi - The original "making of" TV special from 1983
• Anatomy of a Dewback - A chronicle of the making of the new effects for the Special Editions. Originally released on StarWars.com when the Special Editions hit theatres.
• Star Wars Tech - A special from 2007, analyzing the technology of the films and how close it is to reality.

When the Blu-Rays were originally announced back in January, we were given the vague release date of "September 2011."  Well, we now have a specific release date:  September 16.  It'll be released in three different boxed sets:  the original trilogy, the prequel trilogy, and the "Infinite Saga," which is the nine-disc monstrosity outlined above.

Oh, and the original theatrical editions are NOT on the discs, so, make the usual protests. 

Alpocalypse Track Listing!

The countdown continues to Weird Al's new album, Alpocalypse, and I'm buzzing with the excitement that only a new Weird Al album can bring.  Just perusing the Internets, and I'm finding that the track listing to Alpocalypse has been released!

Ah, looking over this track listing, I'm taken back to my childhood, leafing through my brother's Columbia Record House catalogues, reading the track listings for all those Weird Al albums and wondering what the songs were about.  "Is this a parody of that?"  "That song's got a strange title...I wonder what it's about."  "Man, I wish Mom and Dad would raise my allowance so I can actually buy these and find out!" 

Now, a lot of these songs will look familiar.  And that's because, as Weird Al has been saying for a while now, all the songs from his 2009 digital EP Internet Leaks are on this album.  So, the album is, like, 50% new material, and 50% 2-year old songs. 

So let's take a look here!

1)  Perform This Way - His aforementioned (and already blogged-about-by-me) parody of Lady Gaga's Born This Way.

2)  CNR - Part of Internet Leaks, his White Stripes-style song about acting legend Charles Nelson Riley.

3)  TMZ - No idea if this is an original or a parody, but will obviously be about the gossip-mongering website.

4)  Skipper Dan - My favourite from the Internet Leaks collection, about a gifted young actor and the only gig he can get:  working on the Disneyland Jungle Cruise ride.

5)  Polka Face - With a title like that, this is obviously the requisite polka medley.

6)  Craigslist - The first one released as part of the Internet Leaks collection, his Doors-tribute about the classified ad website.

7)  Party in the CIA - Many Weird Al sites are already agreeing that this is most likely a parody of Party in the USA by Miley Cyrus.

8)  Ringtone - Also from the Internet Leaks collection, all about annoying ringtones.

9) Another Tattoo - And now the confusion of my youth.  Parody or original?  I have no idea. 

10)  If That Isn't Love - One thing Weird Al does is twisted love songs, so I'm guessing this is an original.

11)  Whatever You Like - The only parody on the Internet Leaks collection, a parody of T.I.'s Whatever You Like.  Given the economic downturn, our singer can now only afford to by his girlfriend "whatever she likes" down at the Dollar Store.  (Fun trivia fact:  the only Weird Al parody that has the same name as the original.) 

12)  Stop Forwarding That Crap To Me - Based on the title, we know what the joke is.  But again, parody or original?  I'm not sure.

Oh, and also revealed that, following the model of his last album Straight Outta Lynwood, the album will come with a DVD, featuring animated music videos for 10 of the 12 songs on the album!  The only ones not getting music videos are Perform This Way and Polka Face. 

June 22!  Now available for pre-order on Amazon!