I hit a few places I read about in the classified ads. Don't get me wrong, everyone has standards, and even I have mine when it comes to minimum wage shit jobs. I just refuse to flip burgers or wait tables. Just some deep-rooted phobia that keeps me from doing it. And I even have my dream jobs in the "minimum wage shit job" category: clerk at video store, stocker at Toys R Us, usher in a movie theatre.... Naturally, my resume got dropped off at the video store and, yes, Drayton Valley's movie theatre is hiring! I have to apply in person after 6pm, though, so I'll probably head back tomorrow night to drop off a resume for that.
The big surprise was when I dropped off a resume at IGA. The customer service clerk just absent-mindedly skimmed my resume until her jaw dropped. She looked at me with a deer in the headlights look and said, "You worked cash at Extra Foods?" I said, "Yes." And before you could say daijobu, I was in an interview with the store manager for a cashier position! The interview just kind of went like this: "You're experienced? Good! You're hired!" I said, "Woah! Wait a minute! This is all going way too fast for me. Can I at least have a day to think about it?" So, they're expecting my answer this Thursday.
And even for sentimentality's sake, I dropped off a resume at Extra Foods. The only problem with that was I filled out my application form under the watchful eye of the Photo Lab Manager. Drayton Valley Extra Foods' Photo Lab Manager is the personification of everything I hated about working at Extra Foods. She's this fat old cow who sits behind the photo lab/customer service counter and likes to think she's queen of the store. We never got along. The final straw came shortly before I left for Japan. She tried to get me fired by falsly accusing me of selling cigarettes to kids. As I filled out my application form, we had this conversation:
Her>> So, Mark, you're back here begging for a job. I guess things didn't work out in Japan, eh?
Me>> No, they worked out. I just decided to come home.
Her>> But, you came home a year ago, right? You've been struggling to find a job all that time, right?
Me>> No, actually, I've been in school.
Her>> Oh? Where?
Me>> NAIT. I'm studying broadcasting.
Her>> And no one will hire you to do that, eh?
Me>>
(exit Me)
I noticed in the careers section of the Edmonton Journal that Drayton Valley Extra Foods is also looking for a new assistant store manager. Just for the hell of it, I sent in my resume for that. I know I won't get that, because the person who hires that position is the regional manager that I tore a strip off of. And I won't accept it, either, becasue it would mean giving up my broadcasting career. But still, it would be nice to come back and have the authority to fire the bitchy old Photo Lab Manager.
Oh, well. Barring unmitigated success when I apply to work at the Drayton Valley Theatre tomorrow night (their hiring concession clerks, projectionists, and janitors), it looks like I'll be a cashier at IGA.
Next Issue...Who is Jenny Welsly?
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