Right now, I'm just fascinated with these Canadian Tire commercials. Canadian Tire has just developed a hose reel that will automatically roll up your garden hose! And how does it work? Why, it uses the water pressure in the hose to power the reel! Genius! Canadian Tire really is becomming the store for useless gadgets.
I wonder how Canadian Tire comes up with all these gadgets. I betcha they have a lab somewhere. The top secret Canadian Tire laboratory. I bet an average day at the Canadian Tire lab goes a little something like this....
Johnson>> And, as you can see here, my latest research has developed a possible cure for cancer!
The Supervisor>> That's all well and good, Johnson, but your job was to develop A CAMP STOVE CD PLAYER! Your fired, Johnson!
Johnson>> But wait! You haven't seen this yet! It's a flashlight that doesn't require batteries!
The Supervisor>> Remarkable! How does it work?
Johnson>> Well, I perfected cold fusion, sir.
I wonder if I can turn this into a 1-minute long bit for my radio show....
And while I"m at it, let's fill you in on the latest on Fahrenheit 9/11. First, the good news. A distributor has been found! Canada's own Lions Gate Films will be putting it into theatres. A release date of June 25 has been set, and we're promised that it'll be the biggest opening ever for a documentary. Swing by Michael Moore's Offical Site to download the trailer.
And now the bad news. Here's the latest controversy. The latest person to be pissed off over the film is...Ray Bradbury. He's the genius sci-fi author who gave us Fahrenheit 451. Bradbury's hopping mad because Michael Moore never asked for permission to use a Fahrenheit 451 sound-alike title! As far as Bradbury's concerned, Moore's ripping him off and he's considering legal action. I'm paraphraisng Bradbury here, but Bradbury said that it would be like him writing a book with the title Gone With the Wind. You just can't rip off a title like that, he says.
I gotta go try and download that trailer now. I really wonder if this movie is worth all this controversy.
Next Issue...Terror in the Canadian Tire Labs
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