A quick update on my scheme to get one of every lawn sign. Tonight at around 8:30 I finally heard from a Conservative volunteer. He'll be bringing by a sign tomorrow. Actually, he wanted to give me several dozen so I could help pass them out. And then, the Green candidate himself (I love that he's doing all this himself) called me back at 9pm. Sadly, I was out for a walk and missed his call, so I'll be calling him back tomorrow. Yeah, I try to go for a walk everyday, because I know if I don't, I'll just sit on my ass all summer growing fatter and fatter. *sigh* I miss Japan, where I walked everywhere and lived on nothing but Corn Flakes (for breakfast), peanut butter sandwiches (for lunch), and ramen (for supper). God, I got so skinny!
Anywho, I haven't had one of these for a while. Today, I had a great idea for a dialogue snippet. Sometimes, I just get these fragments of conversations. Someday, I'll write the world's greatest play and you'll read these lines:
Woman>> If you do it for me, I'll give you a cookie.
Man>> Hmm... Is this a literal cookie, or a code word for something else?
Woman>> It's a literal cookie.
Man>> Chocolate chip?
Woman>> You know it.
Man>> Consider it done.
Inspiration for this came from watching The Toy Castle, which I obsessed on in my latest column. Essentially, the boys didn't want to play with the girls, so the girls said, "If you do it, we'll give you cookies," and of course, the boys started playing with the girls.
I think that this is just a great life lesson for the kids who watch the show. Let's be honest, ladies. We men will do anything to get your cookies. Only when I say "cookies," it's a metaphor for, well, whatever you're offering.
Next Issue...Working Stiff
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